Winston is definitely getting worse. He's no longer interested in food at all. He will only eat if I put food in his mouth and try to make him swallow. The antibiotics don't seem to be doing anything for him and the swelling is traveling down his leg. When he stands up to go outside (which isn't all that often now since he doesn't want to drink either) all of the fluid pools around his hock. I feel like I'm watching him die and it's awful. I cry a lot these days. I've mentioned putting him down to Don and he is horrified by the thought. He thinks I'm too quick to go that route. It's killing me to watch Winston suffer so much.Wednesday:
Winston's leg is now twice the size that it used to be. He's having a hard time going out to go potty because there's so much weight on that side for him to try and lift. It's obvious that his leg is painful and his back is all twisted up trying to hold that leg off the ground. I'm using the sling but hey, he's a boy and it's not all that easy to try and take some of the weight off his back legs when he's got a full bladder, nevermind get it out of the way when he stops to pee. Luckily he's not going out that often, but that makes me worry that he's getting dehydrated. I just worry worry worry all day and all night. This is the hardest thing I've ever gone through and I'm questioning how much longer I can stand it. Am I weak? Maybe.
Don isn't ready to let him go, and I can't take him away from Don if he feels that strongly about it, so I'm just trying to deal with all my feelings.
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